The Friggin' Vacation

Benny!!!

We're in line for 'Pirates of the Caribou!'  Where you going?

He wants to ride 'Space Mountain'
Drive over a pothole with your father
There's your 'Space Mountain'
I fear for my life every time he makes a left turn

Where'd you get those Mickey ears from?

You better not have paid for those
With that credit card we took from--

--Uh, borrowed from your grandma

You want Mickey ears
I'll tape two paper plates
To the side of your head

Bing, bang, boom--Mickey ears

Jesus, it's friggin' hot

I feel like I'm dying

Why do we come here every year
So we can roast like baloney pigs?

Why don't we just sit at home
With the oven on
And take turns sticking our head in it?

Benny, c'mere, your friggin' face is a mess

Who let you eat that turkey leg from Frontierland?

You look like Tony the Caveman

Ugh, look at you
You got turkey ankle all over you
You're a friggin' mess

You have your grandmother's eating habits
One time we let her eat egg salad
It was like the friggin' Titanic exploded
All over her

This whole family's full of slobs

No, we're not going on any 'Jungle Cruise'

Because your mother is scared of hippos

I don't know what it is about them
But something ain't right

They always look like they wanna say something to you
What do they wanna say?
Somebody wants to say something to me
Let 'em say it

Friggin' hippos
Think they're better than me

You wanna go on a fun ride after this?

Let's go on Dumbo

That's a good story

Dumbo's mother dies in the forest
So he steals a magic feather
From seven little men
And when he's holding the feather
He can lie and his nose won't grow

'S got a nice message to it, that story

The message is--when your mother dies, you're screwed

So appreciate your mother

Here we go, front of the line

Oh look at you get so excited
Even though you're going to throw up
All over the pirates of the caribou

I friggin' love you
You little geyser

Now gimme your Mickey ears

You're not the only one on vacation