The Honesty Hour

There's this game now
Called honesty hour

You get somebody
And you go in a room
And you close the door
And you start the clock

One hour
Total honesty

So okay, the door's closed
The clock is ticking

Let's do it
Okay?

After the hour's done
We can pretend that everything we said in here
Was just made up or whatever
But while we're in here
Only honesty
Okay?

Okay

I get a question
Then you get a question
Or, I mean
You can ask as much as you want
I guess
But let's make sure
We both find out
You know, whatever it is we want to...

I'm afraid
I'm afraid constantly
I think about dying constantly
I think about kids coming into my school
With guns
And killing me
Because I'm there
Because I just happen to be there

I'm afraid that it'll be so tough to get into college
By the time I'm applying for college
That I'll have to go to a really lousy college
Or no college at all
And everybody will be disappointed in me

I'm afraid I haven't gotten a childhood
Because we all have to work so hard
Because kids in China don't care if they get a childhood
So they don't sleep or eat
They just study
And now we have to be like them
And that's really messed up

I'm afraid of lab rats getting loose
And biting me
And giving me ebola

I think I'm ugly
I think my right hand is bigger than my left hand
And I don't know if there's a way to fix that
Even with surgery

I think I talk too much
I think when I'm quiet I'm boring
I think in ten years we're all going to be underwater
And I almost want to become a Republican
So I can believe things
I know aren't true

I think my voice is too high
I think my hair is just...stupid
It's just stupid hair
And my mom and my sister have great hair
Except my sister wants to dye her hair black
Because she's a moron
And why can't I have blonde hair like her and my mom
Instead of black hair like my dad?

And why doesn't my dad talk to me
And I mean, is that normal?
And am I too close to my mom?
And do I look the age that I am?

And what if I die young
Of some undiagnosed something?
And is it stupid to worry about this
But I mean, how can you not worry about all this
And why do you have to play a stupid game
To be honest with your best friend
Who you secretly are so jealous of
That sometimes
It's hard
Just to look at him

...And I just realized that you haven't asked me anything yet

Okay, well...

Well maybe we should stop
Or...

Or give ourselves another hour

I...

I think we might need more time
Or at least
I'd like more time

I'd like a lot more time actually

Is that okay?